#28DaysofGratitude – Day 28

I believe there is a fundamental shift in the way people assess their lives, as they move from the 20’s to the 30’s. The 20’s are all about exploration – experimenting, testing new waters, failing unabashedly, being okay with not having a clear answer to “where am I going in life?”. It’s not reckless necessarily, but on the spectrum of fearless to fearful, their risk appetite is more tending towards the former. On the other hand, the 30’s, more specifically, post the age of 35, one starts thinking more in terms of longevity or legacy – “am I making a mark in my world; what am I leaving behind?” These thoughts figure naturally, while making choices.

On the last day of the Acumen Fellowship, we were all asked to write our epitaph as a “fun” (yeah, funny sense of humor, they got!) exercise – pen down what we would be remembered for, if we were no more. I’ll be honest – it took me over 25 minutes, and some help from Google, to really even write the first word down on paper. The personal stuff came easy – and what a relief that was! Being able to name over 10 individuals comprising my family, friends and dogs, that I was “leaving behind”, is a blessing I knew was rare. However, professionally? That was, and still is, hard for me to comprehend. What would I want my legacy to be, really?

My mom has been a teacher for over 30 years now. She worked in schools for many years before starting her own business. I was 13. At the time, we were 4 students (yes, I was one of them) who would sit around the dining table in our living room. There was an old, green chalkboard mounted on one wall, that would throw clouds of chalk dust in the air every time she wrote down boring algebraic equations. One of her students, Advait, took a special liking to her- he hated math and science, you see, and it was her patience and coaching that helped him clear his exams. She has a way with students, my mom. She has a temper, and her students bear the brunt of her yelling on multiple occasions. But she’s so invested. It bothers her when they don’t do well. It hurts her when they choose some other teacher over her – not from a pure business customer growth standpoint, but a blow to her talent and commitment. And almost all of her students know that she’s more than just a teacher – they confide in her; even when they can’t talk to their parents, they trust her. Every year, on Teacher’s Day, our home is filled with handmade gifts, cards, chocolates, flowers. Her students who have graduated many years ago make it a point to visit, to take her blessings and show her that they’re doing well in life.

So does Advait – every year without fail. He is in the Merchant Navy now, so he is sailing away for 6 months of the year. But every time he lands, he makes it a point to visit my mom. He brought a box of sweets when he first got into Maritime School, he got another box when he graduated, he came after his first successful sail, he came to give her his wedding card, he brought his wife to introduce her to his teacher, and then last week, he brought his newborn son. It’s been over 15 years since we all sat around that dining table. Isn’t that what legacy is? When someone touches your life through boring algebraic equations?

What my mom did was nothing out of the ordinary, if you think about it. She chose a vocation, not just a career. Legend has it that when she was in school, my mom would study history and science by pretending to teach the walls, tables and windows of her room. Almost like a theater performance! She was a natural. But she honed her skills through years of training. And she did her job really, really well. For well over 30 years, she put in the work that was needed. Bore the shit sandwich of demanding parents, demanding hours, less time with her own family – all because of the love for teaching.

Maybe that is all it takes then. Rather than think about legacy today, let that be an afterthought to an immense, genuine, sincere body of work that is built over years. Work that puts people first, work that is not calculated, and is personal. With the hope that in due course of time, the legacy will show itself at your funeral.


#28DaysofGratitude – Day 27

When I was in the midst of job-hunting over the past few months, one thing I was very clear about was choosing a CEO and company that I really connected with, in terms of values, and mission. Which is why, rather than apply for jobs the traditional way, I looked up companies I thought were solving interesting problems, and asked for a conversation with the CEO. Some of these requests had very interesting and memorable results. I am reminded today of one such interaction with the CEO of an ed-tech start-up in India. I happened to speak with her on another unrelated occasion, and found her so motivated and engaging, that I had to reach out later. After weeks of back-n-forth and cancelled meetings from her end, we finally met in her posh, new-agey office in the center of the business district. After the initial pleasantries, and exchange of information, I asked her what germinated the idea of the company she had now been running for 5 years. Her answer was immediate – “Because I want to create a dent in the universe. And I felt education was the way to do it.” Probably a 10/10 answer, if she were pitching to a potential investor.

I’ve been wondering for a few days now – it is almost mandatory nowadays for CEO’s to use words like innovation, cutting-edge, and disruption while describing their idea. If you cannot use the “Uber of XYZ” phrase to describe your start-up, you’d rather shut it down immediately – you’re clearly not doing enough. Right? But is this desire to innovate and disrupt, the birthplace of real innovation? Is that where one starts, or is that more of a by-product along the journey – one that should begin with the desire to solve a real problem?

When I first spoke to this CEO, I loved the ambition behind wanting to create a dent in the universe – it sounded purposeful, and motivational. But on deeper thought, it told me nothing about the real driver behind the company and the CEO’s mission. It seemed more like an external image that needed to be built – that of being a disruptor and dent-creator. But what is Step 2 here? How does one go about doing that? And if I were to work for her, how do I, as an employee, help her with her mission?

As I spend more time interacting with people in the start-up and social impact space, I am growing increasingly uncomfortable with terms like “changing the world”, “ending poverty” etc. The fact is, one individual or organization cannot possibly know how to do that. It takes years of consistent effort across multiple interconnected systems, some of which, we have no visibility of. What one can begin with though, is the intention to create a positive impact in our sphere of influence, however small that may be – commit to go as deep as possible to understand the issues at play, and then choose a starting point for an actionable step. While this may not sound flashy and inspirational, it begins with humility.

Humility to accept that we do not have all the answers, that we would make mistakes and need to start all over again. But as long as the intention is exploration and then continuous small actions, there is no shame in admitting failure and retracing your steps. Imagine starting with wanting to create a dent in the universe, and then realizing you have the wrong weapon in your hand!


#28DaysofGratitude – Day 26

Last Thursday was my first day at a new job. I now work for a social enterprise called Habba, an artisan-centric e-commerce initiative based out of Bangalore, India. One of my more drab, rather first-world worry on my first day was- the kind of laptop I would be given at work. You see, I’ve never owned or purchased a laptop of my own since 2011. I was fortunate enough to work at companies that gave me a laptop to use. And especially in the past year, with the financial limitations of the Fellowship, I knew I could not afford to buy myself a laptop right-away.

At about noon, one of my teammates places this device on my desk – it is a massive, 15.6-inch Dell laptop – heavy as hell (I swear, it weighs over 3 kg!) and a far cry from the ones I’ve been given previously! I crack a silly joke about growing bigger biceps from lugging this “non-laptop” around, but yeah, I’m not happy. I knew I would need to buy a new bag because the one I was using wasn’t big enough.  On my cab ride home, I had already begun researching affordable compact laptops on Amazon, shortlisted 2-3 I wanted to consider buying, and done some mental math about whether I could afford the purchase.

I come home and see V sitting on the couch, waiting to hear stories. The first thing I do is take this monstrosity out from my bag and show it to him – “Look at the laptop I got, it’s hugeeee, uggghhhh…” He takes one look at the device and his first words are – “Wooaahhh they gave you a Core i5 ! This is aweeesoommeee…” What, no – that’s not the plan – we’re supposed to hate this thing. Before I could say anything else, he had opened the Settings and added 5 other impressive things to his list – the hard disk space, the RAM, and other things that my silly mind was too irritated to even remember.. And so, that was that.

Fast forward 48 hours, and I am sitting with this 3 kg device on my laptop, writing my first blogpost after three months. I already have a new laptop bag that cost me like 1/27th the price of a new laptop, thanks to the power of Amazon Prime. I don’t necessarily love the device, but I can make my peace with it.

Sometimes we need someone who will be the wind beneath our wings. And other times, we need someone who will cut short our useless flights of fantasy and bring us back down to ground reality. Sometimes we need someone who will show us that the greener side of the grass is right there in front of us, because we’re too busy complaining about the heat. And many times, we just need to be grateful for a laptop and five blog followers! 🙂